More than half a century ago i was born in a little town called Neede, Netherlands. My background is simple working class. Hard labour to make a living. I survived kindergarten, made it through preleminary school and i became a high school graduate. After high school i went to college and hopped from job to job. First housepainter, the profession i was trained in. Followed by a short serie of jobs, now known as flex jobs, were i mainly applied paint in some kind of form. Lastly i worked fourteen years at a diary company. A reorganisation made me lose that job and it ended my career as a labourer. Twenty years of doing what i was told to do left me tired. I desided to pursued a career as a novelist, but luck wasn't on my side. A week shy of her 41st birthday my younger and only sister sadly passed away in 2009. In the following years i was forced to face the declining health of my parents. My father was diagnosed with prostate cancer and was a heart and kidney patient. Dementia took away what i used to know as my mom. My mom looked like my mom. My mom sounded like my mom. My mom felt like my mom when i touched her. But that light that used to be my mom was gone. My parents past on in 2015, seven month apart. In 2017 my life took a new course. One i had not seen coming. It was never a plan, a wish or a desire and even by the time that new life came to be, i had no idea what had happened, what was going to happen or were life was taking me. Granted, i like to help people, but i'm by far not the only one. Life made my search for my answers. Life set me on a course to find my personal reality. It made me relive my youth. My teenage years. My scolioses. My later life. My father, the only one i'll ever have. His narcissistic personality disorder. Life made me relive everything. It gave me the chance to liberate my system, to free my being from emotional pains, fears, anxieties, ego, stress and the illusions i used te believe. Underneath that pile of pain i met myself. The person that i really am. The person i did not know and did not love. Life gave me the chance and the means to derive a theory. How the universe may have come to existence. How it may work. How life on planet earth may have come to be. How humans may have come to existence and who you and i may be. I can't tell if it's real. I don't own any evidence, nor do i have the means or expertise to perform experiments that could support and proof my theory. It therefore remains my personal reality and it remains just a theory. 


I'm Robert Allard. Human, deep sensitive and an understanding but playful soul.